Lemme scoot over and make some room for you on the toilet.
Dude beating me to my favorite gif by 20 hours
Spread your legs I’ll piss through the gap. Don’t worry I have good aim
Now there’s an image.
If you’ve pissed without pants on you know it doesn’t matter how well your aim is, you’re always taking some stray’s
Imagine the splash back if you were sitting right over it?
Like the least-effective bidet you could imagine
Actually did that with a girlfriend when we both got home and had to immediately piss.
Worked fine. Just wasn’t allowed to shake it in her face so had to dab with toilet paper.
I once made the mistake of taking a shit at school. And I heard a group of boys walk in and say “yo someone is shitting in there” and then they repeatedly kept asking who it was, kicking on the door, throwing wet paper towels over, then climbed up and peered over the side. School is a hell.
Why? You need some? I could fish some out of here and throw it in your face.
Never attack a man who’s armed.
Was that just a thing kids did? I have an identical story down to the wet paper towels…
Definitely was so I just never pooped at school.
Me too, problem solved. It helps that I have ADHD and can’t feel the need to go as much so I can ignore it until I get home.
Hold up that’s related to ADHD?
Anal Department Has Delays
Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Defecation
Yeah so I was told
“You should’ve went during the break.”
You mean should’ve gone ?
“Oh thank God, you’re right on time. Quick, get some gloves. I’ve got something stuck up there and could use some help! Hello?! Are you still there!?”
This could backfire spectacularly
Or it could go exactly as planned.
I’m stuck here stepbro, I’m stuck here.
What gets me are how many people don’t lock their doors in public.
Pooping with friends
lmao, saw this in a rest room several years ago, different style door tho
Like Romans.
here a lot of restrooms don’t even have working locks lol.
rattle rattle
“Uh! Wh-who is it?!”
RATTLE RATTLE
“Uh … occupied!”
BAM BAM BAM “UUARRRRRGH! UUARRRRRGH!”
“I, uh … j-just you wait until I-”
BANG BANG BANG! "UUARRGLE! UUARRGLE!
“Right, you! What’s your-”
Bathroom is empty.
When they knock, just say “Come in.”
Be enthusiastic about it: “OOOOH, come IN!”
“the party’s just starting!”
The other day some asshole rattled the door so long and hard, as I was repeatedly shouting occupied, that the lock jiggled open and I had to hold the door shut with my foot. Then the guy shouts “What the fuck?!” and storms out of the restroom.
What the fuck, indeed, buddy. What the fuck, indeed.
He didn’t want you to leave, he wanted to join you
Be a kind neighbor, unleash a gutteral animalistic screech to help loosen their bowels and shorten their visit.
One time, not only did the person try the door, I yell “OCCUPIED”… then pounded on the door, then tried the handle again… somehow immediately got the attention of an employee who just fucking unlocked the door. And I’m just standing there, dick in hand like “WHAT THE FUCK”… and they were like, “oh sorry, we didn’t think anyone was in here”. Couldn’t wait one god damn minute, cause I had just walked in.
Tried this the other day at a tourist spot and the door wasn’t locked.
I will never unsee.
Hello, I’m the person on the other side of the door in this meme and JUST KNOCK!
“Come in!”
( ･ิ ͜ʖ ･ิ)
Don’t knock, just accept that it’s locked and wait until I’m done fighting for my life in here. I don’t want to have to speak while at my most vulnerable
This is the “just letting you know that someone is waiting” signal. I only do it when they’re taking fucking forever.
Hey, sometimes it takes a bit to find the right vid. If you need to poop so bad, go poop in the sink.
Every workplace ever. Coupled with comment about always taken toilet (I swear to god some people forget they have to go until they see someone head in the toilets general direction)
Ay, you poopin in there!?
It’s self defeating as you give the user pinch lock. Now it takes longer for them to relax back to the state of utopian release.
