Iamsqueegee

Aw, man! Jimmy Buffet, too? I guess he liked his young’uns with a big kosher pickle and a cold draft beer.

Deep sea deathticle

But, the apologies and the deep regrets!

Heavy is the head that wears the crown (when the neck is weak and feeble).

These the same idiots that railed against paper straws?

Sweet Home Talibama

Nobody expects the Feline Inquisition!

Vegetables. Purchased with all the intent of eating them before they go bad. I don’t eat them quickly enough and they go bad. There’s no in between stage. They were edible and now they are not.

GOAT FUCKERRRR!

The crown being on top doesn’t seem right.

Look on the back of the stems. That’s usually where you’ll find manufacturer’s stamps. At the same time, they kind of look like tarnished silver. Try polishing them!

That’s how vampires work. And cat snuggles. Both likely come with bites.

deleted by creator

That all depends on what side of the line you’re on.

Do you like hot wings? I like hot wings.

Tuckers?

I don’t think that reads the way you think that reads…

If they just made these ships bigger so you could spot them more easily on a plane void of other vertical structures, then they couldn’t just sneak up on you out of nowhere.

Do you have any idea how hard it is to sharpen a crayon? To find one that hasn’t got teeth marks in it?

The It’s Just a Cold Sore War