Attention and entertainment desired? On social media? That’s just plain wrong.

We do, too.

My wife once caused it to crash by popping an aluminum bottlecap on top of the control interface.

You have misjudged me, but I do appreciate the response.

Sure, but presumably evidence is needed for such an accusation. I’m not saying it didn’t happen, but I’ve seen no other allegations and am asking for evidence.

If they display this at his funeral, you’re gonna feel real silly.

I am specifically refraining from expressing my politics publicly, but I do have a question. Borne of curiosity, not to make any point.

Didn’t his brother die of alcoholism? I thought that’s why he doesn’t drink.

Are you sure you’re trying to help and are not a cannibal?

You put “stupid” in quotes but what’s the “joke” here? “Haha, I lied to you, hilarious”? I’m glad people get joy out of this … I guess … But I’m curmudgeonly and don’t get it.

edit: I do advocate checking links before you click them, though. Due credit there.

You have not changed my feelings regarding it.

I appreciate that my client finally shows YouTube pictures but, for those whose don’t - XcQ, link stays blue.

Never understood the appeal of that stupid “joke” anyway.

Sounds like a healthy relationship.

And that car, though.

I mean, it had nothing to do with him, but still. Goddamn sexy car.

Allegedly my great (maybe great great, I don’t know) grandmother tried to murder her husband by putting rat poison in his morning coffee. I don’t know if the forensics back then would have been able to identify that, but fortunately it didn’t matter because apparently rat poison floats.

I was never told what happened to her, though.

Sleep with him while in disguise, then accuse him of sleeping with someone else. Then you’ve managed both!

I thought the first part was so that you could give a valet the keys to park and retrieve your car, but not easily get to your belongings.

Was that employee Elvis?

I once worked in an IT environment where several very expensive servers and their accoutrements were prepped for installation, then put in an empty, locked office for a long holiday weekend, after which the servers were to be installed in our data center.

After the servers were put in temporary storage and my team had gone home for the day, there were some construction guys doing some kind of construction work in the area directly above the empty office. Whatever they were doing, they in some way unsealed a radiator unit or maybe cut it away and didn’t plug the tubing (I know a lot less about radiators and plumbing than I do about IT). They, presumably, didn’t realize this and went home for their holiday weekend as well.

After the long break was over, my boss - whose office was adjacent to the storage office - came in and observed that it was unusual for his carpeting to be so squishy. Turns out, as I’m sure you guessed, water from the compromised radiators had dripped onto the servers throughout the entire vacation, then leaked into the carpet and spread out to his office through the shared door between them.

As soon as my team got in, we were all immediately removed from our duties for the day and tasked with helping him to move the servers over some of the forced air sections of the data center to work on blowing the water out of them. These efforts were bolstered by some of the biggest mobile fans I’d ever seen - I have no idea where we even got them.

The servers were there for at least a week, but I think actually weeks. In the end, I think only one of the servers failed to boot and the rest stayed running for the rest of my tenure there. Still, I’m sure it was scary for a while for my boss - the one who authorized the original payment and who decided where to store the servers.

I thought it was 42.

Or “A book, the contents of which are totally belied by its cover. For instance, any book the dust jacket of which bears the words, ‘This book will change your life’.”

Hey, I’m ~40 and this is that I do, too! Plus work.